I love you, three words I can easily tell a person. These are words that come out of my mouth whenever I feel I have special feelings for a person. But I I have never really understand the true meaning of love.
So I asked myself. What is love? When will I know if I love a person or it’s just infatuation?
I was very confused so I asked help from my family and friends and asked them. When will you know you love someone?
The answers I was getting was “you’ll just know” which made me more confused.
Then as soon as school started, I saw you. And yes I’’ll admit, it wasn’t the first time I was infatuated or it wasn’t the first time I found someone pretty.
But it was the first time I’ve seen a smile as beautiful as yours. You were glowing. I got lost in your eyes. Hearing your cute laugh made my day.
I did what I can to catch your attention. And it worked out. We started to talk and the more time we talk, the more I realize how similar we are. We like the same type of sports, music, movie and many more.
Everytime we speak to each other, it felt like I was slowly getting attached you. You easily make me laugh. I smile just by looking at your beautiful face. You can make me happy even when I’m down. You brighten up my day and help me with the challenges I face. And most importantly, your personality was spot on. You cared so much for people. You wanted to make the world a less cruel place. There was so much love and care in you.
And after knowing all these about you, I had the confidence to tell you what I feel and told you I like you. And I was happy knowing that you feel the same. The more time that we spent together, the more that feeling grew. We made each other happy. And I was there for you during the good and bad times.
But apparently, I made a mistake. I did something wrong. I wasn’t able to explain myself and you started to drift away.
It made me sad knowing that after one mistake I made, you decided to leave. My heart felt heavy and sad knowing that you didn’t want to talk to me. I did what I can to get you back but I guess my best wasn’t enough.
But one day, you decided to talk to me. Only to tell me that you didn’t like me anymore and that you want to be friends only. It broke my heart but I was willing to be your friend even if I have feelings for you. Even if everyday, I think of the times when we were together. I was willing to set aside the feelings I have to make sure that you will have the best friend you always wanted to have.
I listened to every story you share and was there for you always. I knew it was hard to put aside the feelings but you know what’s harder? Knowing that you like someone else. It was painful but guess what? I was willing to help and support you because I knew it will make you happy. And honestly, there is no one to blame but me. I brought myself in this situation and I should be ready to face the consequences. Now, I couldn’t tell you what I really feel because you’re already happy with someone else. It has affected me so much. But whenever I see you with that beautiful smile, it makes me happy.
Now, I have answers to the questions in mind. What is love? Love is a very complicated feeling that will make you do things you thought you could never do. It is something that can make you the happiest and saddest person in the world. Love is giving someone all the chances of hurting you but trusting them not to do it anyway.
When do you know you’re in love? Well, I had to learn it the hard way but I knew I was in love when I didn’t expect anything in return. I knew I loved her when I kept on pursuing her, knowing that there will be no happy ending. I knew I loved her when I did everything to make her happy even if it sucked for me.
Yes, I was hurt but learned a lot. Thank you for everything you’ve taught me. And remember that I will always be here no matter what.
Literature by Cullen Villareal
Comentarios